Divorce and Seperation

I really liked today's discussion about divorce. I especially appreciated the discussion on the predictors of divorce and the processes of divorce, and how we can protect our marriage from divorce. I thought it was really interesting when we talked about the different processes we go through, and how it affects the family. I think that once you reach the emotional divorce stage people will start to notice. Unless you can keep it really secretive, then people who are close to you are going to start to realize that something is wrong. This could affect the children, and it could even scare them a little. The legal divorce is when the family is kind of ripped apart, and you have to deal with the co-parental and economic divorce. This will be hard on everyone involved. After that I think it would be really hard to go through the psychological divorce, just because after being that close and intimate with that person it would be hard to separate yourself emotionally from that person. This could lead to further complications, like if you got remarried but were not psychologically divorced from the other person. I am grateful that my family does not have many divorces, today just looking at the board in class it would be really confusing and hard to deal with divorce. I don't know how people do it. That would put so much strain on the new marriage, and on the children. Also the death of the parent would be terrible, and also very confusing. I admire the people though who do come out of a situation like that and can have a new happy marriage and make it last.
Last was the protection of divorce in your marriage. I agree with the advice to not even talk about divorce. My dad gave my fiance that advice, he told him to never talk about it in the home, and to never even joke about it. I think that is so important, because once it is mentioned you will both have that idea in your head, and sometimes ideas are hard to get out. Another one I really liked that we talked about was to cleave unto your spouse. I think this is so important. Parents, even though they mean well, can really harm a marriage. I think they should just try to separate themselves from the couple for a while, and let the couple start their life without interference. It would just make things easier. Lastly I liked the comment that we should keep marital problems to ourselves. This, I think, would save some marriages. I think this because if you go talk to your mom about all the things your husband is doing to bother you than you mom is going to start disliking your husband, and they will never get the other side of the story. Most stories have two sides and it could be just as much your fault as it is the other persons. So it is just better to discuss the problems with your spouse, and not talk to anyone else about them.